Criticism mounts among gays over California ban
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) – California’s gay-rights movement has been beset by infighting and finger-pointing since the defeat of same-sex marriage at the ballot box, with some activists questioning the campaign’s mild tactics, including the decision not to show same-sex couples in ads.The movement’s leaders “were very timid. They were too soft,” said Robin Tyler, a lesbian comic who created a series of celebrity public service announcements with the slogan “Stop the Hate, No on 8” that were rejected because they were deemed too negative. “We were lightweights on our side.”
Proposition 8, a measure to stop same-sex marriage in California, passed with 52 percent of the vote on Nov. 4 in a painful defeat for gay rights activists. The ban overrode a California Supreme Court ruling last spring that allowed 18,000 same-sex couples to tie the knot over the past four months.
Some gays are complaining that their leaders failed to organize a visible and vigorous defense of same-sex marriage. In particular, they say the movement failed to counter a series of hard-hitting ads warning that the ban on same-sex marriage was needed to prevent children from learning about same-sex relationships in school.
Leaders of the campaign in favor of same-sex marriage say they made a strategic decision not to highlight same-sex newlyweds or same-sex couples with children in their ads for fear of alienating undecided heterosexual voters.
The movement’s first commercial, aired in late September, starred a couple with an adult lesbian daughter. Later ads included a fictional woman with a lesbian niece, California’s public schools chief, and Sen. Dianne Feinstein saying, “No matter how you feel about marriage, vote against discrimination.”
Geoff Kors, executive director of the gay rights group Equality California, defended the choice of advertisements.
“Lesbian and gay people were everywhere in this campaign – as spokespeople, on YouTube, our Web site. For the television advertising, the best messengers were the messengers that were used,” he said.
But Michael Petrelis, a veteran AIDS activist in San Francisco, said the absence of same-sex couples in the media campaign was a fatal error.
“We were seen more as a liability,” Petrelis said. “When you have that kind of attitude, it’s no wonder there was little community buy-in.”
The criticisms extend to beyond how the campaign was run to how people are responding to the ban’s passage.
In the past few days, demonstrators have hit the streets in California, sometimes clashing with police and snarling traffic. They have rallied outside Mormon temples to protest the church’s major role in banning same-sex marriage.
Demonstrations outside a Mormon church in New York City were held on Nov. 12, and outside city halls in every state on Nov. 15.
Some gay rights leaders have encouraged the heated gatherings, while others worry they could backfire and offend churchgoers and others.
Evan Wolfson, executive director of New York-based Freedom to Marry, raised no objection to the protests but said it is important that they be carried out peacefully.
“Peaceful protest is an important, time-honored way of mobilizing people to action for justice,” he said. “It’s completely understandable that people would be expressing their sadness and determination.”
Same-sex marriage is now legal in Massachusetts and Connecticut only, with Connecticut holding its first same-sex weddings on Nov. 12.
Exit polls in California showed that the same-sex marriage ban received a majority from black voters, which has prompted some gay leaders to complain that they were abandoned by a minority group that should understand discrimination.
Kathryn Kolbert, a black lesbian who is president of People for the American Way, a Washington-based group that monitors the religious right, was so worried about a backlash that she wrote a memo to colleagues, warning it is wrong and self-defeating to blame black voters for the outcome.
“It’s always easy to scapegoat when you are feeling bitter about a loss,” Kolbert said. “What we do in America when we are frustrated is blame the people we always blame.”
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I am LDS. Many people do not understand what that is. Mormon. This whole mess is absolutely terrible. All gay and lesbian people should be correcting their own about the hate crimes they are committing in what appears to be tantrum-like behavior mode. Communication is needed in an adult intelligent manner. I hope that is possible. I would never go onto a property owned by an obvious gay or lesbian couple and disrupt their right to express their opinion or damage their property. It is my belief that we lead by our example: do you really want others to respond in kind? I hope not. Perhaps a better answer in this scenario is to get the government out of marriage in the first place. I want for all people to have the benefits that committed individuals have. What actual rights are affected by prop 8? Some of that has become a bit vague. It seemed prop 8 was simply about the title “marriage”. All in all this example that is shown by the no on 8 people is the epitome of “hate”. You might want to re-think trying to get support for your cause. No one will be convinced to your side with these wild and destructive demonstrations that are occurring. Enough with the attacks open a diologue without hatespeech and misrepresentations. It is my understanding that on the yes side there were cases cited to show where material came from. Each individual could check for themselves as to the truthfullness of the information. I do not believe that I came across any backup regarding wild accusations on gay and lesbian websites. Special treatment is different from equal treatment. I’m against the destructive methods used. Shame on anyone involved; you should pay to repair what has been damaged. I would never do that to someone on the other side. And I would vote for someone who ran for a political position if I knew they were capable and didn’t have “hidden agendas” I’m so tired of those, aren’t you? Wouldn’t it be amazing to have someone who could actually do the job? I think it is time to unite in purpose to bring to pass the “real” equality of our nation not special treatment. Special treatment implies incompetency.Before you send an angry hateful email please put some thought into an answer.
Please remember too, Mean people suck!!